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But before they are ready to enter into a successful relationship, former substance abusers must put their past patterns of behavior completely behind them.If you are planning to become involved with such a person, there is a chance it could work – but only if your prospective companion is serious and dedicated to his or her recovery.Before becoming involved with them, it is important to sit down and have a good long talk about what those triggers might be, based on their past experiences and on the insights they have gained during their counseling sessions and during their time in AA or NA.With good communication about this topic, the partner of someone in recovery can do a lot to keep the process on track – while protecting themselves at the same time.While recovering addicts or alcoholics can make excellent companions, there is one principle that should be followed without exception – do not become involved with someone in recovery from substance abuse unless they have been clean and sober for at least one year.This is the advice that addiction counselors always give to their patients, and it should go double for anyone thinking about becoming involved with a former drug or alcohol abuser.If someone in recovery is asking you out or making other kinds of advances at an earlier stage of their rehabilitation, it means they are ignoring the recommendations of their counselors, and this is not a positive harbinger of things to come.We are talking about people with addictive histories and personalities here, and if they are trying to jump into a relationship too soon, there is a very good chance they are attempting to fill the void they feel inside by replacing their drug of choice with something else that will give them the high they are craving.
There’s chemistry, they aren’t unpleasant to look at, but they can’t help but go to bars and clubs on weekends.” Though there’s nothing inherently wrong with this dynamic, Simonovic says, it’s bound to make the newly sober at least a little uncomfortable over time.“Fast forward a few months,” he says, “and this will probably cause a series of conflicts and disagreements.” Fortunately, there are sober dating sites out there that can take the complexity out of this equation.Much like any other online dating service, anyone using First Beat Media’s sober dating sites can simply log on, make a profile, fill it out with pictures and relevant details about themselves and start browsing.When they finally manage to get past all of the chemical baggage that they had been carrying with them for so long, what you will find in most instances is that former addicts have just as many outstanding qualities as anyone else, and this can make them a joy to be around for family and friends alike. Is it wise to form a more intimate connection with an ex-addict or alcoholic, no matter how dramatically they appear to have turned their lives around?In looking at the experiences of others, what we can say is that many who have formed romantic partnerships with former substance abusers have come to regret that decision immensely, while others have been able to establish satisfying permanent relationships with those who have successfully put their past addictions behind them.
So there really is no hard and fast rule here – but there are some things you should think about before getting more deeply involved with someone in recovery.